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Written for: Senior Worldview Seminar
Date Written: 4/18/2010

Perfectionism and the Conservative Holiness Movement
Ryan Watters
God’s Bible School and College


Perfectionism and the Conservative Holiness Movement

Introduction:

Over the past several decades our society has seen an increase in unhealthy neurotic perfectionism that undermines the mental and emotional integrity of its people. Sadly, this also carries over into the Christian realm as well, and, even closer, into the Conservative Holiness Movement (Seamands, 2004). Is the heart of the problem unrealistic expectations or the results when these expectations are not met? Is the problem that our standards are too high, or that our need to achieve them too great? The purpose of this paper is to examine the issue of perfectionism, specifically within the subculture of the Conservative Holiness Movement.

I will be approaching this discussion with the following presuppositions: 1) I believe that all of life should be guided by a Christian worldview. 2) I believe that the Bible is the authoritative Word of God, and is the final authority in all matters. 3) I believe a Wesleyan Arminian persuasion to be the most appropriate interpretive paradigm for rightly dividing the Word of God.

While I will be addressing the issue of Christian perfection, also known as entire sanctification, it will not be the main focus of this paper. I will be focusing on the psychological neurosis of requiring absolute perfection out of oneself and others. I will define perfectionism more closely in the following pages.

The danger when discussing perfectionism is to fall into two extremes. On the one hand, there are those who believe the Bible demands perfection in every respect and flawless performance in this life. On the other extreme, there are those who assert that God is not concerned about our actions, and that His grace covers every failure and fault that we have ever committed, and ever will commit. One of the most difficult things to achieve and maintain in the Christian life is balance. I hope, however, in this paper to find a middle ground between these two extremes.

At the heart and foundation of this balance is a proper understanding of grace—what it is, and is not. What it covers and what it does not. Here is where theology flows over into psychology, and a synthesis occurs. The theology of grace and the frailty of man are wonderfully bound together on a Christian’s journey toward heaven. It is the purpose of this paper to more clearly define the concept of grace, and add equilibrium to an often-unbalanced discussion.

Perfectionism Defined:

Clinton and Hawkins (2009) define perfectionism as, “a disposition to feel that anything less than perfect is unacceptable.... Theologically, perfectionism is the destructive belief that people can be equal to God. Specifically, perfectionistic people think they should be all-knowing (omniscient), all-powerful (omnipotent), everywhere at once (omnipresent), and generally without human frailty” (p.198). But it must be pointed out that many perfectionists, especially those within the Conservative Holiness Movement, would never fully embrace this statement, or accept this statement as true for themselves. It is far more blunt than they would feel comfortable identifying with. Many times they have correct theology, but they subconsciously ignore it, or go against it. They may know that they don’t have to be “perfect,” but they simultaneously require it of themselves. Perfectionism is oftentimes not so much a problem of orthodoxy, as orthopraxy. In other words, a perfectionist sometimes believes the right things, but disconnects it from how he acts or reacts. He may believe the right things about God, and his standing before Him, but he doesn’t fully live out his beliefs at a gut level.

Perfectionism is driven by an insatiable need to feel secure and accepted. Life for a perfectionist revolves around a search and struggle to earn this security. Just how the perfectionist goes about seeking this security varies, but most often it involves setting unrealistically high goals for him or herself hoping to impress and endear themselves to others. However, the problem is that the goals they set are so high they can never fully reach them. This creates a cycle of setting impossibly high goals, and then “negatively evaluating the self in response to inevitable failure” when those goals are not met (Walsh & Ugumba-Agwunobi, 2001, p.240). The reason they set these goals is to achieve a sense of acceptance and security. They desperately desire security, and the only way they know how to get it is to perform so well that people accept them on the merits of their performance.

It is essential here to distinguish perfectionism from excellence. The two are often mistakenly confused. The key difference resides in the motive of the person. A perfectionist strives for improved performance in order to feel accepted and secure. A person pursuing excellence does so, from a Christian perspective, for the glory of God and the furtherance of His Kingdom. I will discuss this in more detail later in this paper.

Control is an essential component of perfectionism. Because a perfectionist has a great need to feel secure, they do everything they can to control their environment in order to ensure the continuation of security lifelines they have set in place. This need for control shows itself in different ways. First, they may try to control themselves, and their performance. Second, they may try to control others, and how they respond. Or, third, they may seek security in being controlled by someone else’s expectations, and the standards that someone else sets for them. They find security in being controlled by others. However, most perfectionists consist of some combination of the three.

This constant search for acceptance by means of performance gives birth to something Seamands (2004) calls the “Super You,” (p.102) and what Manning (1994) calls, “The Imposter” (p.30). A perfectionist stuffs his or her true, broken self deep down inside, and replace it with a shiny new image that everyone will admire and praise. They vicariously receive acceptance, and security through this false image, and so they do their best to polish and bolster its appearance as much as possible to receive more and more affirmation, and thus security.

The problem with this method is that their senses of acceptance and security then become solely tied to, and absolutely concurrent with, whatever level of affirmation the image is receiving at that point in time. If they are doing well and people are stroking the image, then they feel loved, accepted, and on top of things. But if they mess up, and people look on with suspicion, scorn or frustration, then their sense of security plummets, carrying their self-esteem and personal worth down with it. In essence, a perfectionist is what he does. His level of security is directly proportional to his level of performance. The presence of this Super You often goes undetected in the life of the perfectionist. They feed off of each other in a twisted symbiotic relationship. Only when this Imposter is acknowledged, owned, and dealt with can true rest take control of a person's life.

Manning (1994) encapsulates the condition well:
It is one thing to feel loved by God when our life is together and all our support systems are in place. Then self-acceptance is relatively easy. We may even claim that we are coming to like ourselves. When we are strong, on top, in control, and as the Celts say, ‘in fine form,’ a sense of security crystallizes. But what happens when life falls through the cracks? What happens when we sin and fail, when our dreams shatter, when our investments crash, when we are regarded with suspicion? What happens when we come face to face with the human condition” (p. 17)?

Insecurity results when the perfectionist comes “face to face with the human condition,” and they do not receive the level of acceptance and affirmation they need to feel secure. Their paradigm does not allow for grace and understanding in frailty. Acceptance is based on performance, and frailty undermines that performance. For someone to be ‘understanding of your frailty’ implies weakness on your part, and weakness cannot be tolerated, much less embraced. Please note that I am not referring here to willful sin, but rather normal human frailty. Frailty is inescapable, willful sin can be overcome.

Hewitt and Flett (2001) distinguish three types of unhealthy perfectionism: 1) self-oriented 2) other-oriented and 3) socially prescribed (as cited by Walsh & Ugumba-Agwunobi, p.240). These three forms show themselves in different ways, combinations, and degrees according to the individual makeup of each person. Let's briefly look at these three types.

First, the self-oriented perfectionist. According to Hewitt and Flett (2001), “Self-oriented perfectionism involves setting unrealistic goals for oneself, stringently evaluating oneself against their attainment, selectively attending to failure and [over-generalizing] it, and engaging in all-or-nothing thinking” (as cited by Walsh & Ugumba-Agwunobi, p.240). In other words, they hold themselves to a standard unnecessarily and unrealistically higher than everyone else around them.

For example, if you were to ask a self-oriented perfectionist if it was OK for someone to be average, he or she might very well answer, “Yes, of course.” The problem is that subconsciously many believe that it is only OK for others to be average, but they must always be above average. They hold themselves (many times subconsciously) to an unbelievably high standard of achievement. For example, they are disappointed when they receive a 95% on a test instead of a 100%. Why? Because their efforts did not achieve the highest possible standard (perfection). While it is entirely acceptable for another person to receive a 95% on a test, they should have been able to achieve a 100%.

Second, the other-oriented perfectionist. While much the same as self-oriented perfectionism, the demand for achievement is placed on the performance of other people. Others are held to impossibly high standards, instead of one's self. If you were to ask an other-oriented perfectionist if it was OK for a person to be average, they would probably reply, “Yes, but they are capable of so much more. If they would just try a little harder, they could achieve a much higher standard.”

Third, socially prescribed perfectionism. This occurs when a person feels that others have set very high expectations for them. For example, a child may feel that he must perform exceptionally well in order to meet his parents’ expectations for him. A wife may feel that she must be absolutely flawless in order to keep her husband happy. A husband may feel that he must provide for every whim of his wife in order to be accepted by her, and so on. This essentially boils down to needing the affirmation, acceptance, and love of others, and meeting whatever conditions they set to get it. As ironic, or paradoxical, as it may sound, there is a sense of security that comes from being absolutely controlled by someone else, or even someone else’s expectations. This is what he or she seeks.

Symptoms of Perfectionism
As Seamands (2004) points out, sometimes it is easier to describe the symptoms of perfectionism than to give a concrete definition. He goes on to describe six traits that often accompany perfectionism. While there are as many effects of perfectionism as there are perfectionists, most could identify with at least some of these traits.

First is what Psychologist Karen Horney (2004) calls “the tyranny of the oughts” (as cited by Seamands, p. 79). A perfectionist’s mind is sometimes mentally ravaged by an onslaught of statements such as, “I should have done better.” “If only I had done this differently.” “I ought to do better.” “I should be able to handle this.” The perfectionist’s life is characterized by never quite doing it well enough. As Seamands states, “The three favorite phrases of the perfectionist are 'could have,' 'should have,' would have' ” (2004, p. 79). The perfectionists is always striving, but never entirely achieving.

Second, self-depreciation. Perfectionism is almost always accompanied by low self-esteem. They are a deadly duo that constantly robs the person of security by their constant demands and striving for approval. A real danger comes when the perfectionist starts projecting his or her own sense of self-depreciation on God. “If you are never quite satisfied with yourself and your achievements, then the next step is quite natural: God is never really pleased with you, either” (Seamands, 2004, p. 79). Manning (1994), in his book Abba's Child, tells of his own struggle in this area: “Unwittingly I had projected onto God my feelings about myself. I felt safe with Him only when I saw myself as noble, generous, and loving, without scars, fears, or tears. Perfect (p. 23)!” Again, a perfectionist’s level of acceptance is directly proportional to his level of performance. A perfectionist is what he does.

Perfectionism fatally flaws how a person views himself. Instead of looking at oneself as a unique human being created in the very image of God, and innately valuable to Him, we view ourselves as not quite good enough. Not quite at the threshold of acceptance God and others have set for us, and thus subject to their fickle acceptance. The grace component is subconsciously jettisoned, and replaced with a “do-it-yourself” mentality. A perfectionist wants to be a good person so they can be accepted. But they strive to be good for the wrong reasons and by the wrong means. The “Super You” must perform better, or else we will not be worthy of love and affirmation. A perfectionist tries to endear themselves to others, and God, with their actions. Still, these actions never quite seem to be enough to last for the long term.

Third, anxiety. Life for a perfectionist is often not a pleasant one. They live under an “umbrella of guilt, anxiety, and condemnation,” producing an oversensitive conscience (Seamands, 2004, p. 79). This oversensitive conscience leaves the person in a near constant state of turmoil and flux. They are never quite sure of themselves. They are often extremely quick to acknowledge imaginary faults that they see in themselves. Guilt and frustration are their constant companions.

Fourth, legalism. Their oversensitive conscious naturally propels them into legalism. Seamands (2004) explains the progression: “The perfectionist with his fragile conscience, his low self-esteem, and his almost built-in sense of automatic guilt is very sensitive to what other people think about him. Since he cannot accept himself and is quite unsure of God's approval, he desperately needs the approval of other people. Thus he is easy prey to the opinions and evaluations of other Christians” (p. 80).

The perfectionist is worried to distraction over what other people, and God, think of him. They never want to do anything to tarnish the image they project to the outside world. That would mean a decrease in affirmation, which would cause another plummet in their security. So they strive to scrupulously follow every rule down to its smallest minutia. This is justified by rationalizations such as, “Shouldn't we be rule keepers?” “Shouldn’t we carefully obey the Bible?” They live by a rulebook, rather than principles. They live in a world of black and white, with little tolerance for ambiguity. All-or-nothing thinking is the norm. They are rigid in areas where grace and understanding should govern. By doing so, they essentially seek their salvation by careful rule keeping, rather than relationship. Again, caution should be shown to not take this line of reasoning to an extreme. Sin is sin, and should never be lightly glossed over. Carefulness toward sin should flow out of two things: 1) our fear or respect of Him, and 2) our love for Him. It is a dangerous thing to divorce an aversion for sin from a believer’s life.

When perfectionists discover that they can never please all people at all times, and that this will inevitably cause their image to be tarnished, they spiral into frustration, and sometimes depression. They do not truly believe that God, or anyone else, can love them as they are. They may believe God loves them in their heads, but they don’t accept it as true in their hearts.

Fifth, anger. This continual striving to please everyone, including God, slowly builds within the perfectionist a storehouse of frustration, anger, and bitterness. He gets fed up with living by the ought’s. He becomes frustrated with never being able to please himself, others, or God. He suppresses this as long as he can because to acknowledge, much less express, these emotions publicly would tarnish the image of the Imposter. But his resentment is not against the real God. As Seamands (2004) observes, “his resentment is against a caricature of a god who is never satisfied. A god whom he can never please no matter how hard he tries, no matter what he gives up and holds on to. This cruel god always ups the ante a little, always demands a bit more and says, 'Sorry, that wasn't quite good enough.' ” (p. 82). And so the anger seethes and occasionally bursts out, but is quickly recaptured and stuffed further down inside.

Sixth, denial. If this anger is continually repressed and stuffed down inside, the perfectionists will slip into a state of denial. Here is where deep-set emotional issues begin to simmer. “Under the stress and strain of trying to live with a self he can't like, a God he can't love, and other people he can't get along with, the strain can become too much” (Seamands, 2004, p. 82). When it reaches this stage, one of two things can happen; either the person will breakaway, or he will breakdown. A person who breaks away simply gives up on everything entirely, and goes a completely different direction in a search for security via other avenues. A person who breaks down snaps under the weight of imagined expectations from a God Who is never satisfied, from people he can never entirely please, and from a self he can never appease.

Historical Context

Because studies into the human psyche are relatively recent in human history (within the past 200 years), the early church is nearly silent on discussing the issue of perfectionism as defined above. However, evidence of perfectionistic tendencies can be clearly seen throughout the centuries.

Asceticism was a common practice, especially among certain monastic orders. Flagellation and extreme self-denial were the norm in many religions, including Christianity (Britannica, (1995), p.615-616). The goal of such harsh practices was supposedly to purify one’s self for the glory of God. However, it seems often to have been an outlet for a form of self-loathing perfectionism. If you sinned (whether real or imagined), it was because you were not yet pure enough, and you needed to be cleansed further. The way to hasten this cleansing, and to show your true repentance, was to severely chastise your body.

While the physical form of asceticism may not be practiced within the Conservative Holiness Movement, verbal asceticism is still rampant. We may not beat ourselves with whips, but we do brutalize ourselves with words. As Seamands (2004) states, “throughout the centuries, sensitive pastors observed these kinds of suffering Christians and were deeply concerned, long before the word psychology was ever in popular use” (p.77-78). While the psychological term “perfectionism” may be a recent development, its existence obviously runs deep throughout church history.

But the issue touches closer to home than the monasticism of centuries past. John Wesley and his close friend John Fletcher also knew of the difficulties it created. Fletcher once said of some of his parishioners, “Some bind heavy burdens on themselves of their own making and when they cannot bear them, they are tormented in their consciences with imaginary guilt. Others go distracted through groundless fears of having committed the unpardonable sin. In a word, do we not see hundreds who, when they have reason to think well of their state, instead think there is no hope for them whatever” (as cited by Zepp, 1913, p.103).

This describes the state of the perfectionist pretty well. In an attempt to earn his standing and his approval before God and man, he places an extreme level of performance upon himself (“Some bind heavy burdens on themselves…”). When they don’t reach this level of performance they are tormented, and indulge in a form of verbal asceticism. Because of this, even though they may stand entirely acceptable to God and others, they feel condemned because of a misguided conscience. How is their conscience misguided? Because they have not met the unnecessary and unrealistic expectations they have placed on themselves, which is a key component of perfectionism.

Wesley himself was also familiar with the problem. He stated, "But sometimes this excellent quality, tenderness of conscience, is carried to an extreme. We find some who fear where no fear is, who are continually condemning themselves without cause; imagining some things to be sinful, which Scripture nowhere condemns; and supposing other things to be their duty which Scripture nowhere enjoins. This is properly termed a scrupulous conscience and is a sore evil. It is highly expedient to yield to it as little as possible. Rather, it is a matter of prayer that you may be delivered from this sore evil, and may recover a sound mind" (emphasis mine) (as cited by Zepp, 1913, p.103).

Both of these men picked up on the same problem. While they took it only as far as a person’s conscience (what Wesley called “a scrupulous conscience”), the heart of the issue lies in perfectionism. As stated earlier, perfectionism is often at the heart of an oversensitive conscience, and the conscience can never reach a state of rest until the heart of the issue, perfectionism, is addressed.

Cultural Context

We live in a culture that is inundated with demands for perfect performance and high standards. These high standards have propelled our country into unbelievable power and prosperity. If success were the key-determining factor in judging the ethicality of these demands, then most secularists would agree that these standards and expectations are valid, and even desirable. Perfectionism is sometimes looked at positively because it achieves results. However, I feel this is an improper understanding of perfectionism as distinguished from excellence. You can perform well, and achieve much simply by striving for excellence. Perfectionism is not a prerequisite for success.

Culture unconsciously perpetuates perfectionism in its people by its constant emphasis on success. Often, only the best and brightest are affirmed. Praise and support are conditioned upon performance, not innate worth. The performance is praised rather than the person. For example, a woman may lean over to a friend and whisper, “She’s the homely one of the family.” What is the implication? I have to look good in order to be accepted and worthy of love. A father may look at his son’s report card, pick out the ‘A-’ from a list of A’s and say, “Good job, son, but could you work on bringing this ‘A-’ up to a solid ‘A’?” Again, what’s the implication? I have to achieve good grades in order to be fully accepted.

This creates a paradigm of conditional love that carries over when people come into a relationship with God. They assume that because everyone else’s love is conditional, God’s must be as well. Everyone else’s acceptance is fickle, and must be continually pacified; God’s must be as well. You are only accepted in society as long as you perform flawlessly. Admittedly, this may be a hyperbolized paradigm, but it is evident to some degree nearly across the board in our culture. Grace is lost in the pursuit of success.

The Conservative Holiness Movement mixes a lot of theology with its expectations, which, if handled properly, can be quite beneficial. But when these expectations are misguided or uninformed, a great danger is introduced into the lives of its members. Misunderstandings over the doctrine of entire sanctification have added tremendously to the confusion surrounding what God expects of us. Mixed messages seem to be emitted in every direction. This is very unfortunate, because the heart of the doctrine is simple—love. Perfectionists live in a world of levels and standards. It is natural, then, that they want to know what level they must meet in order to claim “entire sanctification.” This standard seems to vary from person to person, and church to church, which throws the seeking perfectionist into unbelievable confusion, and often despair.

The chief proponent of the doctrine of entire sanctification, John Wesley (1777), boiled it down to this simple truth, entire sanctification is nothing more than loving God with all of your heart, soul, mind and strength (p.15). But entire sanctification is rarely taught this way within our circles. With an indefinable standard, an unachievable goal, and an inundation of subjective feelings, it is easy to see why perfectionism has become prevalent within the Conservative Holiness Movement.

Scriptural Context

As a thorough Wesleyan Armininan I must bring everything under the authority of the Word of God. This is my ultimate authority. I must obey everything it directs me to do. So I must address the issue openly and honestly; what does the Bible require of me? It is pretty clear that the Bible has some standards that must be met. For example, Jesus Himself said, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father, but through Me” (NASB, Jn. 14:6b). God is not afraid of placing expectations on the lives of His children. The question is what are those expectations in relation to my perfection?

The heart of the issue is this, is flawless performance commanded in Scripture? The simple answer is, No. We are, however, expected to pursue excellence. Excellence is attainable, perfection is not. Let me explain.

Excellence can be defined as “possessing outstanding quality or superior merit; remarkably good” (www.dictionary.com, n.d.). Jon Johnston (1985) gives a more palpable definition in his book, Christian Excellence, “What is excellence? It’s a certain style of life, a manner of living, a bigness of spirit, a point of view, a frame of reference, a set of priorities, a hierarchy of values, an admirable self-imposed standard” (p.25). Further, the Apostle Paul gives probably the best understanding of what excellence is in Philippians 1:10-11 “I want you to be able always to recognize the highest and the best [excellence], and to live sincere and blameless lives until the day of Jesus Christ. I want to see your lives full of true goodness, produced by the power that Jesus Christ gives you to the praise and glory of God” (Phillips Translation). The New American Standard renders it, “so that you may approve the things that are excellent, in order to be sincere and blameless until the day of Christ; having been filled with the fruit of righteousness which comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God.”

Excellence carries the idea that we are to go a step beyond. It carries the idea of surpassing (NIV, Psa. 150:2); of being noble in character (NIV, Ruth 3:11; Prov. 12:4, 31:10). Most importantly, however, excellence is for the glory of God. 1 Peter 2:12 states, “Keep your behavior excellent among the Gentiles, so that in the thing in which they slander you as evildoers, they may on account of your good deeds, as they observe them, glorify God in the day of visitation” (NASB, emphasis mine).

Excellence, then, involves choosing the better option so that He may receive glory. The pursuit of excellence is not about receiving affirmation and vicarious security, it’s about glorifying God. Notice that it will not always be “perfect,” but it’s not about a pursuit of perfection; it’s about a pursuit of excellence. When life stops being about us, and starts being about His glory, the death grip of perfectionism begins to weaken.

Much confusion has been injected into the issue over the biblical meaning of the term “perfect.” The word “perfect” (and its derivatives) is used 128 times in the King James Version’s text. However, each use of the term perfect must be interpreted according to its context. A common hermeneutical error is to read an English understanding of a word back into the Greek text. The text must speak for itself. “Perfect” in the English language does not always have the same connotations in the Greek language. So, the question must be asked, contextually, what does it mean to be perfect biblically? Does it mean maintaining a flawless level of performance in every context? A brief word study will also enable us to more fully understand the biblical use of the word.

The term “perfect” comes from the Greek word teleios (τέλειος), and occurs 48 times in the New Testament, and 54 times in the Septuagint (Greek translation of the Old Testament). It is translated as “perfect” 35 of those times in the NASB (which is commonly recognized as the most literal translation). Other common translations are “complete,” or “mature.” One of the most authoritative Greek lexicons, A Greek-English Lexicon of the New Testament and other Early Christian Literature (2000), lists the following senses of the word teleios: 1) pertaining to meeting the highest standard (e.g. a sacrificial animal, etc.); 2) pertaining to being mature, full-grown, mature, adult; 3) pertaining to being a cult initiate, initiated; 4) pertaining to being fully developed in a moral sense (Bauer et al., p.995-996). Thayer (1979) concurs with this, and adds, “brought to its end, finished; wanting nothing necessary to completeness” (p. 618).

So, from this study we understand that while the word can mean perfect in the sense of absolute superiority and flawlessness (e.g., sacrificial lamb in Ex. 12:5), it also very commonly means maturity, completeness, and having reached its purpose. I believe that this sense is the proper interpretation for passages that require us to be “perfect.” For example, Ephesians 4:13 in the KJV reads, “Till we all come in the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, unto a perfect man, unto the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ” (emphasis mine), whereas the NASB renders it, “until we all attain to the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a mature man, to the measure of the stature which belongs to the fullness of Christ” (emphasis mine). Often, when you see the word “perfect” in the KJV, it simply means mature.

We must keep in mind that context determines meaning. To choose a word from one verse, and say it means the same in another, is to completely ignore the setting in which the word was given. We have seen above that the word teleios can refer to being perfect in the sense of flawlessness, but it must be determined if the passages that command us to be perfect are used in that sense. Let’s look at a few key passages that use the term “perfect.”

NAS Matthew 5:48 "Therefore you are to be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect.”
This verse is often used to teach Christian perfection. Proponents who use this passage make statements such as “This verse commands us to be perfect just like God is perfect. Therefore, if there is any area of your life that you are not like God, then you are in a poor spiritual condition, and the frown of God is upon you.” This may be a hyperbolized example, but it occurs commonly in many different, though sometimes lesser, forms. They may also question a person’s entire sanctification, of even their salvation. But the context of this verse clearly does not support such teaching. The previous five verses (Matt. 5:43-47) deal with the indiscriminate love of God for people. V. 44-45 state, “"But I say to you, love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you in order that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous” (NASB). To make this verse refer to either the work of entire sanctification, or a standard of perfect performance, is to yank it out of its context, and force a meaning on the text that it does not teach. This verse states that we are to be perfect or mature in love, just as God is perfect or mature in love. We are to love indiscriminately, just as God loves indiscriminately.

NAS 1 John 4:17 By this, love is perfected with us, that we may have confidence in the day of judgment; because as He is, so also are we in this world.

This verse carries many similarities from the passage just discussed in Matthew 5. Again this is not referring to a level of perfect performance, but rather a profound and controlling attitude of love. You can love a person, and still fail to act correctly toward them due to human frailties. This passage does not deny that growth and maturity need to occur, but simply speaks of a state of profound love that can possess a believer’s heart. Just what this state looks like, and how it is reached is beyond the bounds of this paper. The bottom line is this: Perfect love does not equal perfect performance.

NAS James 1:4 And let endurance have its perfect result, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

The context in this verse indicates that the use of the word “perfect” here clearly indicates a meaning other than flawless performance. It carries the idea instead of bringing to fruition, of reaching maturity, of achieving its goal, which is a far cry from perfect performance. It should also be noted that the use of the word “perfect” here is directly linked with being “complete.” Bauer et al. (2000) connect it with being fully developed in a moral sense (p. 996). Does being fully developed mandate flawless performance? No. It simply means having reached a state of maturity that is conducive to excellence. As Guthrie (2006) states, “Perfection here…refers to a maturity of character” (p.213).

We also see from Scripture that we are to strive for excellence.

NAS Philippians 1:10 so that you may approve the things that are excellent, in order to be sincere and blameless until the day of Christ; 11 having been filled with the fruit of righteousness which comes through Jesus Christ, to the glory and praise of God.

“Approve” in this verse carries the idea of ‘to test,’ ‘to discern,’ or ‘to examine’ (Strong, 1890, p.29). In other words, we are to search out the more excellent things. We are to pursue excellence so that we will be sincere and blameless until the day of Christ. “Blameless” here refers not to a level of perfection, but rather a state of honest, pure living. The same word is used in Acts 24:16 in the context of living with a clear conscience.2 Probably the most important aspect of this entire discussion is found in v.11, because in it we find the driving motivation for excellence. At the end of the verse we find the following phrase, “to the glory and praise of God.” Here is our primary motivation, not only for excellence, but for all of life. We are to take the high road by living pure lives so that we can be blameless until the day of Christ (10b) to the glory and praise of God (11b). What does this excellence look like? Paul describes a few attributes of excellence a little later in chapter 4, verse 8.

NAS Philippians 4:8 Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, let your mind dwell on these things.

Here is a brief model of what excellence looks like. Excellence is pursuing truth, honor, justice, purity, loveliness, a good reputation, etc. These are the types of things we are to pursue. We are to fill our mind and dwell on excellent things. We do this not so we can bolster a false image by projecting our “excellence” to the world. At that point it crosses the line into perfectionism. Rather, we do this for the glory of God. The next verse (v.9) talks about the results of pursuing this excellence. It says, “The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you” (NASB). When we follow after God-honoring excellence, we can expect not perpetual tension, but peace.

NAS 2 Peter 1:5 Now for this very reason also, applying all diligence, in your faith supply moral excellence, and in your moral excellence, knowledge;

We are also commanded to seek moral excellence. We are to strive to be morally upright in all of our actions. We are to add as much moral excellence (what the NIV translates “goodness”) into our lives as possible. Again, the pervading motivation for excellence is always for the glory of God (Phil. 1:11; 1 Pet. 2:12).

We also need to understand the concept of grace. While it is one of the hallmarks of the Gospel, grace is possibly one of the most misunderstood doctrines within the Conservative Holiness Movement. In a reaction to the Calvinistic doctrine of free grace, we often go to the other extreme and deny an appropriate ownership of the security that is readily available to us through grace. I believe there is a balance to be found. There is a state of rightful resting in His grace. It is possible to rest securely in the Father’s hand (Jn. 10:28) without going to the extreme of “once saved always saved.”

A thorough treatment of the theology of grace is far beyond the limits of this paper, but it is essential when dealing with perfectionism to have at least a rudimentary understanding of the doctrine. Grace may be defined as, “The outreaching of God’s love and mercy to undeserving people (Eph. 2:4-5) producing in them the desire and power to do God’s will (1 Cor. 15:10)” (Brown, personal communication, 2008). Grace is the abiding tenderness and compassion of God that motivates us, works in us, and shapes us into the person’s He wants us to become. The following passages will help us flesh out this concept more completely.

NAS Titus 3:5 He saved us, not on the basis of deeds which we have done in righteousness, but according to His mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewing by the Holy Spirit, 6 whom He poured out upon us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, 7 that being justified by His grace we might be made heirs according to the hope of eternal life.

Paul cuts straight to the heart of a perfectionist’s search for acceptance. In an attempt to ‘feel’ saved, he or she incessantly strives to earn security and acceptance through performance. However, this passage shows us clearly that we are saved “not on the basis of deeds which we have done,” even though they may have been done “in righteousness,” rather we are saved according to His mercy. We are accepted not on the basis of what we have done, but rather on the basis of His grace, and His grace alone.

As a Wesleyan Arminian am I a synergist? Yes, of course. The human will must cooperate with the divine will, but that does not mean that our actions in any way aid the work of salvation. We are accepted by His grace (Eph. 2:8), not our works (Eph. 2:9). Does this acceptance require my continuance and obedience in the faith? Absolutely (Col. 1:23; 1 Jn. 1:7). But you are never more justified, more accepted, more secure by your obedience. Obedience leads you into greater maturity and growth in grace, yes, but it does not lead you into greater acceptance. A Christian can never be more accepted than he is at the moment of his conversion.

In other words, a person cannot improve their standing before God after salvation by being good. If you are in Christ, you are 100% acceptable to Him. Can you improve in your conformity to His image? Yes, of course. That is where growth and maturity come in. But you cannot improve your level of acceptance. Our love for God should motivate us to strive for excellence, just as a husband’s love for his wife motivates him to pick up after himself around the house. He does not do it to be accepted by her, but rather he does it to please her. Again, I am not referring to high-handed, willful sin, but rather being completely open to the sanctifying work of the Holy Spirit in our lives as He molds us to the image of His Son. Our love for God motivates us to seek continued conformity to Jesus Christ.

NAS Colossians 1:21 And although you were formerly alienated and hostile in mind, engaged in evil deeds, 22 yet He has now reconciled you in His fleshly body through death, in order to present you before Him holy and blameless and beyond reproach-- 23 if indeed you continue in the faith firmly established and steadfast, and not moved away from the hope of the gospel that you have heard, which was proclaimed in all creation under heaven, and of which I, Paul, was made a minister.

This verse gives us the foundation for our security in Christ, the foundation for our continued acceptance. We are accepted by God when we fully surrender to Him, and yield ourselves totally to His control (Rom. 6:11-13). After this, you are fully accepted by Him. The only condition placed on this acceptance is this, you must “continue in the faith.” What does it mean to continue in the faith? It simply means to maintain a full surrender to God, and whatever He desires for your life (Rom. 12:1-2). Out of what does this full surrender flow? Out of a deep love for God. When you love God with all of your heart, soul, mind and strength (Lk. 10:27), it provides the perfect motivation for continually yielding yourself to His control.

NAS 2 Corinthians 12:9 And He has said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness." Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, that the power of Christ may dwell in me. 10 Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.

This verse has been often abused, and so I will attempt to handle it carefully. It is important to keep in mind that the entire tenor of this passage is to promote the glory of God through our lives. This passage is all about Him. As Christians, we are to seek to bring Him glory to the best of our ability. God, in His sovereignty, has chosen to let weaknesses remain in our bodies, and in our lives for at least two reasons: 1) So we never become reliant upon ourselves, and 2) So He will receive all the glory for our accomplishments. It must be understood that “weaknesses” here is not sin! The Greek word translated “weaknesses” is astheneia, which is never used to refer to sin, but rather human frailties. In fact, the NASB translates it as “sickness” or “illness” on a regular basis. It refers to the human condition that we all live with.

It was in this context that Paul was praying. He had asked God to remove this “thorn in the flesh,” which obviously had been troubling him. However, God in His sovereignty chose not to remove the problem from Paul’s life. Why? So that God could display His power for all to see by enabling Paul to do things he in himself could never accomplish. The word “perfected” here means to find consummation in, to bring to completion. In other words, God allows weaknesses to remain in our lives so that He can pour His strength into us, which results in His power coming to full fruition, to full consummation in our lives. When this happens, God receives the glory, and not us. Plummer (1915) was correct when he stated, “Where there is weakness, strength reaches completeness. Where human strength abounds, the effects of Divine power may be overlooked” (p.354).

God has chosen to allow human frailty to reside in us so that His power might be more powerfully and obviously at work in our lives. Bellville (1996) states, “God’s power neither displaces weakness nor overcomes it. On the contrary, it comes to its full strength in it” (p.309).
It is the natural proclivity of fallen man to seek glory. If it were our strength that accomplished a goal, then we would try and take the glory. To help guard against this, God wisely chose to allow us to be weak. Because He desires to see us suffer? Hardly! Because He desires our relationship. He knows that when we rely upon Him for our very existence, happiness, and well-being, our relationship will be naturally deepened, and His glory manifested in our peaceful reliance. Piper (2003) was right when he stated, “God is most glorified in me when I am most satisfied in Him” (p.10).

From the above study we have seen that we are not required to achieve flawless performance in every respect until we reach heaven (Col. 1:28). However, we should continually strive for excellence. And, finally, we can rest secure in the grace of God, as long as we “continue in the faith” (NASB, Col. 1:23). We should always seek to please God in our actions by choosing the more excellent alternative. Still, we should never expect total perfection in our actions until we see Him face to face.

One more issue must be addressed before we move on. Here is a far reaching, but true statement; God loves you unconditionally. What does it mean for God to love you unconditionally? It means there is nothing you can do, or not do, to make God love you more. Conversely, it also means there is nothing you can do, or not do, to make Him love you less. Now, caution must be shown here. Do not confuse unconditional love with unconditional acceptance. God loves us no matter what we do. For example: 1) He loves us so much he does not want us to perish (Jn. 3:16); 2) He showed us His love by sending His son to die for us (Rom. 5:8); 3) He loved us long before we loved Him (1 Jn. 4:10-12).

God loves everyone exactly as they are, period. However, do not confuse His love with His acceptance. God is holy, and one of the key components of holiness, biblically, is to be separate from sin (Rom. 1:18; Psa. 5:3-6; 1 Jn. 5:17). Not only is God holy, but He requires that we, His children, be holy as well (1 Pet. 1:15-16). So in order to be accepted by God we have to be holy, and in order to be holy, we have to be separated from sin. Let me give an illustration of just how this works.

I am currently living the Christian life to the best of my ability. I am walking in all the light that I have (1 Jn. 1:7), and am victorious over willful sin by the grace of God. I feel that God loves me just as I am. But, I could wake up in the morning, walk out the front door of my house and decide to become one of the greatest sinners who ever lived. I could go out and spend the next 30 years of my life sinning in every way conceivable, and at the end of it God would still love me just as much as He did before I fell.

However, he would no longer accept me because of the habitual, willful sin in my life. I would be separated from Him, and be subject to eternal punishment. So while God would love me, He would not accept me. Some may think this inconceivable, but I disagree. What if, for example, a father had several children, and one of these children became a physical threat to the others through poor behavior. The father would be forced to remove the child from the home for the safety and well being of his other children. While he would still love the child who was removed, he would not accept him into his home.

The same occurs with God. He loves us dearly, and does not want us to perish in our sins (Jn.3:16), but He will not overlook our sin in order to accept us (Ps. 101:7). God’s stance toward sin is very clear in Scripture. Romans 6:1-2 states, “What shall we say then? Are we to continue in sin that grace might increase? May it never be! How shall we who died to sin still live in it” (NASB)? Further, 1 John 3:4-6 states, “Everyone who practices sin also practices lawlessness; and sin is lawlessness. And you know that He appeared in order to take away sins; and in Him there is no sin. No one who abides in Him sins; no one who sins has seen Him or knows Him” (NASB).3 And, finally, Psalm 119:104, “From Thy precepts I get understanding; Therefore I hate every false way” (NASB).

Some may ask, what good is God’s love, then, if it cannot guarantee our acceptance and standing before God? To that I answer, everything! Without the love of God that he lavishly poured out on us, we would have no hope of ever coming to know Him. God’s love is what motivated Him to redeem us, and this redemption is brought about by grace. So grace, really, is the result of love. But the value of love is not relegated to the past. God’s love for us is what continues to motivate His gracious actions toward us today. Of what use is love? Love is the basis on which we have hope for grace. Love is the brush that gently lays the paint of grace on the canvas of our lives. It is through grace that we gain acceptance. It is through grace that we maintain acceptance. It is through grace that we “continue in the faith” (NASB, Col. 1:23).

A perfectionist can struggle with both God’s love and His acceptance. Their theology may dictate that they believe God loves them, but they may not feel that He loves them. Or, they may feel that He accepts them, but still holds them at arm’s length for a ‘trial period.’ Neither paradigm is true. Romans 8:14-17 shows us the degree to which God accepts us.

NAS Romans 8:14 For all who are being led by the Spirit of God, these are sons of God. 15 For you have not received a spirit of slavery leading to fear again, but you have received a spirit of adoption as sons by which we cry out, "Abba! Father!" 16 The Spirit Himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, 17 and if children, heirs also, heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, if indeed we suffer with Him in order that we may also be glorified with Him.

God is not a neurotic Father Who accepts only the best and brightest we give Him. He is not looking for a reason to reject us. Quite the opposite is true. According to this passage, God loves us so much He 1) gave His Spirit to guide us; 2) adopted us as sons, not slaves; 3) gave us the right to call on His name; 4) gave us His Holy Spirit to assure our hearts that we belong to Him; 5) made us a fellow-heir with Jesus Christ; and 6) gave us the promise of future glorification with Him. Think about that for a moment. We are fellow-heirs with Jesus Christ. In other words, we are just as much a son, just as much an heir, in God the Father’s eyes as Jesus Christ. We are just as accepted as Jesus Christ. This passage does not draw a picture of a God Who only tacitly accepts us under duress; rather this God is anxiously awaiting to adopt us into His family, and pull us into His embrace. He wants to give us all the privileges that accompany being a child of God. We never have to wonder about God’s thoughts toward us. He made it abundantly clear that He loves us, and that He is aching, wanting to accept us into His family.

Application

So where do we go from here? We’ve examined perfectionism; we’ve seen its causes, its difficulties, and the biblical case against it, but now what? Here are a few steps to help those working through perfectionism.

1) If you are struggling with perfectionism, realize that you are not alone. This is probably one of the most common struggles of those within the Conservative Holiness Movement, and Christendom at large. The first step is to realize that it’s actually a problem. Until you accept that this is something that needs to be addressed in your life, no progress can be made.

2) Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater. God has probably instilled within you an innate drive for excellence; don’t discard that in an attempt to overcome perfectionism.

3) Come to a deep understanding of who you are in Christ. Gain your sense of worth from Christ, and Him alone. Thurman (2009) states, “Perfectionists need to find their worth not in what they do or how well they do it, but in being God’s creation” (as cited by Clinton & Hawkins, p.189).

4) Begin to live each moment in the realization that you are fully accepted by God, and you are pleasing to Him, and that is what really matters. Find your center, your worth, your purpose, your happiness, your joy, the very reason for your existence in Him, and Him alone. As this happens, your focus shifts from yourself to God. You become less worried about your performance, and more about His glory (Phil. 3:11). As Manning (1994) states, “Define yourself radically as one beloved by God” (emphasis his) (p.49).

5) Begin to wean yourself away from your need for praise and laud from others. I realize that affirmation from another human being is necessary and acceptable in the Christian life, and that’s not what I’m referring to. What I’m saying is don’t receive your acceptance, confidence, and emotional well-being from the praise of other people. There is only one Person Who can meet that need in your life, and that’s Jesus Christ. Manning (1994) states, “When I allow God to liberate me from unhealthy dependence on people, I listen more attentively, love more unselfishly, and am more compassionate and playful. I take myself less seriously, become aware that the breath of the Father is on my face and that my countenance is bright with laughter in the midst of an adventure I thoroughly enjoy” (p.56).

I like what Augustine said, “There can only be two basic loves, the love of God unto the forgetfulness of self, or the love of self unto the forgetfulness and denial of God” (as cited by Manning, 1994, p. 34). Ask yourself, why am I doing this? Is it so others will think highly of me, or for the glory of God? Stop performing for others, and start living for Him. When all of life becomes all about God, performance stops being about you, and starts being about Him.

6) Do not place demands on your life that Scripture does not explicitly require. Live carefully, yes, but do not live in a continual sense of dread. Seek to please God in all things, certainly, but when you come to a crossroads decision, don’t let a fear of error paralyze you from making any decision at all. Live life with a frank, open reliance on the grace, mercy and leadership of God. It is possible to live life with an attitude of total surrender to God, and submission to His will. Live each day with yielded abandon as you seek to find and do the will of God. Leave the rest up to Him. If you fail, realize that you are human, pick yourself up, and move on. Remember that we do not have to willfully sin, but if we do, we have an Advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ (1 Jn. 2:1-2). Don’t let a mistake devastate your emotional state, or even your spiritual walk. God is rich in mercy (Eph. 2:4), and is standing ready to pull you back up.

Does this mean we overlook sin? Certainly not. Romans 6:1-2 clearly states that we should not continually live in sin. God never overlooks sin, and I am certainly not insinuating that He does. I’m simply saying don’t live life in such a fear of making an error that it robs you of the abundant life He has promised you (Jn. 10:10). Live each day with a pervading confidence in the sovereignty of God.

7) Realize that once you are accepted you can never be more accepted. Should we strive to please Him? Yes, we should (1 Tim. 4:7-10). He is worthy of our efforts to please Him. But don’t continually strive to be accepted by Him. There is a difference. As I illustrated earlier, think of it as a husband and wife relationship. Should the wife strive to please her husband, and should the husband strive to please his wife? Certainly, out of love for one another; but they are not striving to be accepted. Acceptance is a foundational element of any relationship. It is part of the commitment that binds the relationship together. You can never strive enough to become acceptable to God (Isa. 64:6). You need only come to Him in faith. It is by grace that you are saved through faith (Eph. 2:4), not your efforts. Accepted is accepted. There are no degrees of acceptance. There is growth in Christlikeness and maturity, yes, but that does not affect your level of acceptance before God. Live instead in the wonderful awareness of the love of the Father.

My prayer is that you will come to a confident awareness of the love of God in your life. That you will become connected to the One Who loves you so dearly, and feel fully secure in the love of the Abba. “Now to Him who is able to do exceeding abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us, 21 to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever. Amen” (NASB, Eph. 3:20-21).

Reference

Belleville, Linda L. (1996). 2 Corinthians. Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press.

Brittanica, (1995). Asceticism. In The new encyclopedia britannica (Vol. 1, pp. 615-616). Chicago: Encyclopedia Britannica.

Clinton, T., & Hawkins, R. (2009). The quick-reference guide to biblical counseling. Grand Rapids, MI: BakerBooks.

Danker, F. W., Bauer, W., Aland, K., Aland, B., Reichmann, V., Arndt, W. F., Gingrich, F. W. (2000), A Greek-English lexicon of the New Testament and other early Christian literature, Chicago, IL: The University of Chicago Press.

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Guthrie, G. (2006). James. Hebrews - Revelation (Expositor's Bible Commentary, The) (Revised ed.). Grand Rapids, Michigan: Zondervan.Johnston, Jon. (1985). Christian excellence. Kansas City, MO: Baker Book House Company.

Manning, Brennan. (1994). Abba’s child. Colorado Springs, CO: Navpress.

Piper, John. (2003). Desiring God. Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press.

Plummer, Alfred. (1915). A critical and exegetical commentary to the second epistle of St. Paul to the Corinthians. New York, NY: Charles Scribner’s Sons.

Seamands, David. (2004). Healing for damaged emotions. Colorado Springs, CO: Cook Communications Ministries.

Strong, James, (1890). Strong’s exhaustive concordance of the Bible. Nashville, TN: Abingdon Press.

Thayer, Joseph H. (1979). The new Thayer’s Greek-English lexicon of the New Testament. Peabody, MA: Hendrickson Publishers, Inc.

Walsh, J.J., & Ugumba-Agwunobi, G. (2002). Individual differences in statistics anxiety: The roles of perfectionism, procrastination and trait anxiety. Personality and Individual Differences, 33, p.239-251.

Wesley, John. (1777). A plain account of Christian perfection. Kansas City, MO: Beacon Hill Press.

Zepp, Arthur C. (1913) Conscience alone not a safe guide. Chicago, IL: The Christian Witness Company.

Footnotes

1 The fear of the Lord is to continually adopt God’s attitude toward sin (Brown, personal communication, 2006). This fear, rather than relegate us to servile cowering, propels us into abundant living.

2 The same Greek word translated “blameless” in Phil. 1:10 (avpro,skopoi) is used in Acts 24:16 to refer to a blameless conscience. When taken in context, both seem to carry the concept of ‘not causing offence’, or ‘not stumbling’.

3 For a detailed analysis of the use of the present tense verb a`marta,nw in this verse see Dr. A. Philip Brown II’s excellent article at: http://www.apbrown2.net/web/NTStudies/Response%20to%20James%20Erwin.htm.